Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Corvallis, Oregon

Stewardship and Care

a sermon by Marcia Stanard

March 1, 2009

All rights reserved, 2009

 

Ask Much, The Voice Suggested

 

Ask much, the voice suggested, and I startled.

Feeling my body like the trembling body of a horse

tied to its tree while the strange noise

passes over its ears.

I who in extremity had always wanted less,

even of eating, of sleeping.

Agile, the voice did not speak again, but waited.

"Want more" --

a cure for longing I had not thought of.

But that is how it is with wells.

Whatever is taken refills to the steady level.

The voice agreed, though softly, to quiet the feet of the horse:

a cup taken out, a cup reappears; a bucketful taken, a bucket.

 

~ Jane Hirshfield ~

 

There is a funny little fish called the goby. It’s about three inches long, and lives in the ocean, in the den of a blind shrimp.  Neither creature could survive without the other.  The goby goes out into the ocean, but not too far, and gathers food, mostly plankton and other goodies that float past, which it shares with the shrimp.  In the meantime, the blind shrimp digs out the burrow that the two share.  The shrimp works excavating the sand, while in the meantime keeping one antennae on the tail of the goby.  When a predator approaches, the goby flicks its tail and the roommates quickly rush into the burrow.  This is known as a symbiotic relationship, and they exist in many places in the animal kingdom, from clown fish and sea anemones to cattle egrets and rhinos, symbiotic relationships enable various species to thrive in ways that they couldn’t alone.

 

Our seventh principle as Unitarian Universalists asks us to covenant together with Respect for the Interdependent Web of existence, of which we are all a part.  Most of the time, we take this as the earth centered principle, and when we think of the 7th principle, we think of things like our carbon footprint, our need to eat healthy, local, ideally organic food, and recycle.  We think of our symbiotic relationship with the planet, with the food we eat, and the natural world we love and wish to protect. 

 

All these are good and important things.  But today, I want to preach to you about a different type of interdependent web.  I want to talk to you today, about church. 

 

Now, I’m going to ask your patience on this one.  Because I know that technically, you are not the UU Church of Corvallis, you are the UU fellowship.  But talking about fellowship is a whole different ballgame.  I am using the generic definition of church here.  Not the building, not the Baptists or Episcopalians, but church in the sense of any religious community that gathers together every week. 

 

When I talk about church, in this context, I’m talking about all of you.  I’m talking about this interdependent web that you create together, as a religious community.  Part of that community is directed outward, like we saw today in the children’s time.  We work together to make the world a better place.  And part of it is, and should be, directed inward. 

 

Chuck Collins has a wonderful article in this month’s UU World.  He writes about “working together to create common security”, and in the article he quotes a Duke University study on Social Isolation.  According to the study, in 2004, 25 percent of US citizens said they had no one they could confide in about personal troubles.  Zero.  This is double the number of people who said the same thing 20 years earlier, in 1985. 

 

Collins is writing about what might happen in the economic downturn that we’re in right now, and he quotes Drake Bennett who writes of a new type of economic depression where people are isolated in their houses, perhaps with additional family members crowded in, watching television.  Bennett writes of the difference between the soup kitchens of the 1920’s and the possibility today for economic depression to instead accentuate the isolation people are prone to today. 

 

Collins’ hope is that instead of isolating ourselves, the silver lining to the downturn could be a resurgence of community building.  Meals at home.  Slowing down.  Interacting with friends to grow a garden, buy food in bulk.

 

I’m seeing the leading edge of this in my own communities.  I have some friends in their late 20’s who’ve lost their jobs recently.  But they still want to socialize, so we went over to someone’s house recently and played “Apples to Apples.”  People brought food and wine and we played board games, and had a great time.  This is building community. 

 

And where better to begin to learn about mutual aid and building community?  Right here, in church. 

 

Most of us are blessed with other forms of community.  With families or friends or co-workers, or classmates, or all of the above.  But there’s something special about church.  I mean really, besides maybe your family, where else are you going to walk up in front of a room full of people and light a candle and say, “I have cancer.” Or “I lost my job.” Or “The baby is going to be ok.” 

 

We live in a world where the rules of communication and place are being completely redefined.  Where living across the country from someone doesn’t mean you can’t talk to them every day, for free, in any number of ways.  We’ve got cell phones and instant messaging and email and Skype.  You can have friends who live in Maine, like I do, and know more about their daily lives than you do about your next-door neighbor. 

 

But when the crap hits the fan.  When you fall and break your ankle, or have the flu or a new baby, the friends in Maine can’t drive you to the hospital.  They can’t pick up your kids or bring over a casserole.  And if, like me, you really don’t have a relationship with your next-door neighbor, what are you going to do? 

 

For a lot of us, you call the church.  I have friends, Tina and Melissa, a young couple and the proud parents of a little girl, Amelia. Tina stayed home with their daughter, while Melissa worked as a volunteer coordinator for a non-profit.  Life was good.  But then, Melissa got a brain tumor.  She was 28 years old. She had surgery to remove the tumor, which was benign.  But brain surgery is a dangerous and complicated thing, and it took a long time to recover.  For months, she couldn’t work, couldn’t be alone caring for the baby, couldn’t walk without a cane or get through the day without a nap.  Tina cared for her, and the baby, drove her to her appointments for physical therapy, occupational therapy, and the doctor. 

 

Now they were lucky.  They had good health insurance, which is one of many things the church can’t provide.  But what the church did do, was organize a list serve that brought them dinner several nights a week.  For 6 months, this family was fed, and not just with squash soup and tuna casseroles, but by the knowledge that people out there cared enough to cook for them and bring it over. 

 

There is a power in caring community.  There is a power in the church that is unnamable, unknowable, but unfortunately, not unsinkable. Because all it takes to sink a church, is for each one of us to decide that we don’t have to support it.  That we can’t spare the money or the time or the energy to be here. 

 

You have a fabulous minister in the Reverend Gretchen Woods.  But she is not the church.  You are the church.  Every single one of you here today, to one extent or another, is the church.  Whether you are on the board of trustees, or are the single largest contributor or whether you just walked in the door today, you are the church.  It is your interests and energy and volunteer work and presence in the pews and yes, your money, that allows this place to exist. 

 

But, I can hear you thinking, but bringing over soup and taking care of one another isn’t about money. I can do all that stuff alone. 

 

And yes, on some level, you can. 

 

But on another level, without money for the building, and the minister, and the music and the heat, the church community wouldn’t exist.  Without the bonding experience of Sunday mornings and worship, and religious education the community wouldn’t exist.  It’s a symbiotic relationship, just like the blind shrimp and the goby. Without you, there is no church, and without the church, there is no community.

 

But a key piece is still missing here.  We know we need the church, to provide community, to educate our children, to fill our souls, to provide us with opportunities to change the world. 

 

We know the church needs us, to thrive, to continue, to grow.  To fill the pews and show up for the classes and sing in the choir, and to pay the bills. 

 

But something is missing in this analogy.  We aren’t just blind shrimp and gobies.  We aren’t just involved in a daily scooping out of the sand to keep the ceiling from falling in, though occasionally it can feel like that.  

 

But the real reason to support the church is bigger than that.  Or even, I dare say, smaller than that.  We support the church because to do so, changes us. 

 

Now, I’m not going to tell you that throwing a couple of dollars into the collection plate is a life-changing event.  It doesn’t really work like that.  But what does happen when we put our money together with that of others is a cumulative effect.  Part of that is in the collection plate.  Your five gets added to your 20, and her 10 and the organization you are supporting benefits. 

 

But the biggest thing that happens when we really give;  when we pledge, as we say in my home congregation our time and our talents and our treasure is that it changes us. 

 

Cecilia Kingman Miller tithes, or gives 10% of her income to the church.  She does this as a spiritual practice, because, as she says, “Tithing tells me that the income I earn—large or small—does not define who I am.  Tithing teaches me, over and over again, about my dependence upon others, and theirs upon me.  Ultimately, it teaches me to place my trust in something other than money, to understand that my security does not lie in material things.  Rather, my security lies in community.” 

 

She continues.  “We, in all our material wealth, believe in the myth of independence.  We believe that all we have is ours, rather than the community’s.  And we believe that we must make it on our own.  Tithing forces me to put those myths at risk.  It tells me I belong to something greater than myself.  It frees me.” 

 

The act of tithing, or being truly generous with one’s pledge, one’s support of this community has the power to change us.  In this time of economic insecurity, many of us are afraid.  We’re afraid of losing our jobs, our houses, our security.  Even for those of us who are actually in pretty good shape, the times and the news make us afraid.  But the best antidote to fear is hope.  If we believe in the power of this community, if we believe in the power of this church, if we believe in the power of love to overcome fear, then generosity is a powerful practice of that belief. 

 

I have to tell you a funny story.  A few years ago, someone approached me on the street and asked me to sign up to donate to Mercy Corps.  Now, Mercy Corps is a fantastic organization.  Based in Portland, they help with everything from Katrina recovery to micro-loans in India and Pakistan and Tsunami relief in Indonesia.  But I, maybe like some of you might be doing when you pledge, hesitated.  I’ve got kids to support.  When payday gets close it’s a big juggling act to get everything paid.  Anything unexpected goes on the credit card.  How can I justify one more expense? 

 

So I politely declined, went to my car in a parking lot and backed up.  I was distracted and looking somewhere else, and as I stopped to turn the wheel and pull out, I noticed that I’d come about two inches from hitting someone’s fancy SUV, parked behind me. 

 

Well.  I can take a hint.  Especially one as obvious as that.  I pulled back into my space, parked the car, and signed up for automatic deduction from my checking account.  I don’t miss that amount each month.  It’s out before I know it’s there.  And no, it’s not a ton of money.  But it makes me feel like I’m doing something about the problems in the world that are too big for me to solve alone.  And that spiritual practice changes me. 

 

We are so used to thinking that we have to provide for ourselves, and that no one else is going to take care of us, that we are afraid to give.  I know I see this scarcity mentality in my own household, and in my own head.  We’re so used to supporting ourselves, and to having to support ourselves, that the church gets put in the charitable giving pot that, for many of us, is the leftover money.  But for many denominations, that 10% comes right off the top.  Do they love their God or their church more than we love ours?  Is tithing simply a way into heaven—rent paid on space in the afterlife, and therefore something that we don’t need to do because we don’t believe in all that silly stuff? 

 

I think that we are so concerned with how we spend our money to support our values that we sometimes miss the way that we can have the most effect.  It’s expensive to buy organic food and fair trade coffee and a new Prius.  And yet we do many of these things because they support our values.  Because we know that how we spend our money says something about what we value. 

 

But let’s think about the spiritual practice of removing some of that money from the pot in the first place.  Of placing some of that money where it can do good locally, right here.  We are more than the cars we drive or the coffee we drink.  Together, we can create change that is sustainable right here, in this congregation.  Together, we can remind ourselves that rich or poor, we are incredibly blessed. 

 

It’s been a difficult year for me in some ways.  Last summer, I separated from my partner of over a dozen years.  We have two children, and continue to share a house, for reasons both financial and familial.  But I’ve been given an incredible gift out of this experience.  My analogy was that my family was a clay bowl, holding us together.  We were safe in there. It was comfortable.  And when the bowl crumbled, that was scary.  But the most amazing thing I discovered in the dissolving of the bowl was that I was held by the pond.  The pond was everyone who offered to pick up my kids, or let me sleep in their guest room.  One friend even gave me a key to her house.  The pond was the Holy, walking me through this last year, holding me up when I know I could not have done it alone. 

 

We are held in this beloved community.  Sometimes, it takes stretching to see this.  Sometimes it takes the spiritual practice of generosity to see how blessed we really are.

 

When we have practiced generosity, we are more able to be open to receiving.  It’s much easier to give than to receive for most of us.  Giving is a powerful act.  We feel generous and helpful and important.  Tithing, or giving generously to our religious community is an even more powerful act, because it’s not just about us.  Tithing is a reminder that we are not simply alone in the world, blessed by our own hard work, pulled up by our proverbial bootstraps.  We are children of the Holy, responsible to care for one another. 

 

At some point, every single one of us in this room will need help, in one way or another.  The practice of generosity will allow us to be gracious recipients as well.  It is not our moral failings that make us need help, any more than our inherent goodness that makes us wealthy according to the standards of the world.  We are simply and always, blessed.

 

As stewards of this earth, of this community, of this congregation, and of each other, give us the blessings of growth and stretching.  Let us be mindful of how the practice of giving affects not only those who receive, but those who give as well.  May we recognize the many ways we are so richly blessed, and share that wealth with the community that provides us with sustenance for the journey. 

 

May it be so.  Amen.